Don't Mess with Breakfast

This morning, I was creating a masterpiece of food, when someone tried
to stop me. The person said, "Stop making the potatos and bacon, there
isn't time. Just make toast."

This person, this morning, has commited a crime against humanity. This
sort of behavior is both evil and un-American. Please, everyone join
with me as I pray for this man's soul.

Read Neuromancer

Neuromancer has got to be one of the best books ever. I still cannot
believe how relevant it is today, more than two decades after it was
written.

Most sci-fi only makes perfect sense for a few years. Eventually
technology succeeds in ways unplanned, which takes away a lot of the
thrill of sci-fi books. If a story mentions that 100 Gigabytes is a
lot, it is doomed, soon to be as outdated as the computers it talked
about.

Neuromancer is written almost all the way in metaphors and slang. Yes,
metaphors, and slang. By never taking anything literally, the book has
secured its position of being "timeless". Check out this sentence.
This is the first sentence in the book, and it drops you in the middle
of a world that is both bleak and technologically advanced in ways you
can't imagine.

"The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel."

The sky was the color of TV fuzz. In fifteen words to describe the
color of the sky, most of the sentence is spent talking about
technology. This is just great writing, and there aren't many ways to
beat a sci-fi book that starts like this. I can't tell you how many
times I've read this book, but it's more than five. The crown jewel of
William Gibson's career, this story is solid technomagic in action.

Get Rid of Coffee

On a recommendation from Steve Pavlina, I've decided to stop drinking coffee.

This will most likely be met with a vast amount of geek criticism, but
I've held true almost a week, and I'm pretty sure it's safe to say
that I am not addicted.

I've personally had a few revelations, and I think that Steve would
mostly back me up.

1st revelation: Coffee is a diuretic. If you stop cold-turkey like I
did, and you used to drink five or six cups of coffee daily like I
did, you will notice this severe change to your diet. Like I did.
Simply speaking, a diuretic will speed up your digestive system.
Getting your body used to diuretics will make your digestive system
work normally while you take the diuretics. If you stop taking the
diuretics, your body will cramp up, bad. Basically, transition slowly,
or risk constipation.

2nd revelation: Coffee is a nervous stimulation. Everybody knows this,
hence the popularity of coffee. However the stimulation we so crave
early in the morning is not completely burned out of our systems by
the time we go to bed. This makes time spent sleeping not as
effective, and has been attributed to some particularly grouchy
mornings.

Personal verdict, I feel much healthier. I've gotten over the
constipation (thank G) and feel less tired than when I was a black
coffee guzzler. Place this in the For What it's Worth category.

Tom Clancy, L. E. Modesitt, Jr.

It's been a while since my last post. I've spent all my free time
reading books, so no web.

I read two fairly old books, Clear and Present Danger by Tom Clancy,
and Magic Engineer by L. E. Modesitt, Jr.

Clear and Present Danger was awesome, even better than the 1994 movie,
IMO. (Spoilers ahead) The death of the FBI Director was much shorter
in the book, and much more effective. The bad dudes fire the anti-tank
missiles, and it is all over. Very sad, very final, no heroics. The
book ending was sadly lame, but realistic. The best part of the book
was when Clark was talking to the bad guys at a road block, Larson is
just about wetting his pants because he's so scared, and two sentences
later all the bad guys are dead. My head was spinning it was so fast,
just like Larson's head would have been spinning. Extremely good
writing, Clancy! I was left thinking, who the heck is this Clark guy?
Holy smokes he's good! A 9 out of 10.

Magic Engineer was pretty good in it's own way. I automatically hate
anyone with three periods and one comma in their name, and L. E.
Modesitt, Jr. takes the cake. (Even worse then J. R. R. Tolkien.)
Magic Engineer is the third book in the Recluce saga, and second one
I've read. Bad move, anyone? Beyond the order and chaos magic rhetoric
is some impressive dialog and well thought-out characters. The good
guy is both a wimp and unbelievably powerful, a combination that would
make any story-teller salivate. A 6 out of 10.

Convicted retard?

Shouldn't acting like a retard be a felony?
There should be a way of determining how stupid actions are, and a way
to keep track of who did it. I think that if someone does something
really dumb, it should be on par with a misdemeanor. If they do
something that would be appropriate for a person with far, far less
IQ, (their rated IQ - 50) it should be a felony.
That way, when they apply for a job, they have to mark it down. Do you
really want to hire a guy that accidentally burnt down his
grandfather's gardening shed while burning leaves with gasoline?

America the Beautiful

America is the greatest country in the world, of course.
Today, I walked to the local oil depot (gas station) to get some junk food.
I had to walk about a half mile through a grassy field, and I wasn't
robbed and later executed by Mexican guerrillas. I got to the city
roads, and while I was crossing, African freedom fighters hanging off
the sides of a passing cargo truck did not riddle me with AK-47s. I
got to the station, and while I was there, Palestinians did not blow
it up. I paid for my sealed-in-plastic, sanitary junk food, and the
Chinese Red Guard did not arrest me for being unpatriotic. The walk
home was equally fantastic.
All in all, an excellent country. However, do we really think the rest
of the world is that crummy? It sounds like the ripoff of a bad,
sci-fi, Utopian/Distopian plot-line.

Derrick vs. Steven Part 3

The driver of the limo tried to stop his vehicle, but the rubber tires burnt black tattoos into the road, and the car smashed into the sudden appearance of Derrick. The limousine's hood crunched into an invisible wall.
The bubble of energy around Derrick proved to be surprisingly resilient, to the pleasant surprise of its occupant.
With trembling fingers, Derrick typed out a hasty set of commands to the computer controlling his energy field.
Several invisible knives sliced through the road around the disabled automobile. With a misstep, part of the rear bumper fell off, and a tire was knifed in half. Derrick winced at the loud pop, but continued with his plan.
In seconds, Derrick, the limo, and a large section of road rose into the sky. They were above the roof-tops of the Detroit apartments when several bodyguards jumped out of Derrick's captured vehicle. They fired pistols at the wacky scientist, but the bullets were as ineffectual at piercing the energy field as the limousine's engine block.
Derrick sent a beam of energy through the middle of the car, and made a bubble around each half. One bubble held the bodyguards and chauffeur, the other held the prize.
Derrick let the unlucky personnel go, gently depositing them on the roof of an unremarkable apartment, and released their energy field.
Then it was just Derrick, half of a limousine sitting on a jagged chunk of asphalt, and one Mr. Steven Vance, trembling on leather upholstery, all floating above the fine city of Detroit.

Derrick vs. Steven Part 2

Derrick had a monitor strapped to his arm displaying all policed traffic. If Steven's car drove by any intersection, the licence plate would be marked, and show up on the screen. Derrick couldn't hack into the police database, but he did have a low-tech hidden camera watching at a convenient police station, looking over the shoulder of an underpaid officer.
An alarm blipped on Derrick's small terminal. He had found Mr. Vance.
He toggled his joystick, and the generator in his huge backpack fired up even louder.
Derrick was sitting in a bubble of solid energy, high up in the air, generated by technology in his backpack that not even he, the inventor, completely understood.
He directed himself to the correct street, saw the Coolex limousine, and zipped down to street level.
He clumsily stopped about a foot too low, and the bubble under his feet crushed the asphalt. A ripple of dust and chunks of road went flying in every direction.
Derrick had landed right in front of the oncoming limousine.

Derrick vs. Steven Part 1

The sunset was a colorful, diesel stain on the western sky. The city of Detroit lay in a capitalist, greedy sprawl below Derrick's feet. Somewhere down there, was Steven Vance, the man with the knowledge of Coolex's business plans, corporate takeovers, and most importantly, personnel.
Coolex had the population, resources, security and land holdings of a small country. Spread out across the face of the world, of course, like any self respecting, megalomaniacal company. Mr. Vance was one of their top lawyers, and he would probably know what Derrick needed.
With a corporation the size of Coolex, it was best to start hacking at the top.

Clarence Day, Jr. wrote the Best Essay Ever

The world of books is the most remarkable creation of man. Nothing else that he builds ever lasts. Monuments fall, nations perish, civilizations grow old and die out; and, after an era of darkness, new races build others. But in the world of books are volumes that have seen this happen again and again, and yet live on, still young, still as fresh as the day they were written, still telling men's hearts of the hearts of men centuries dead.

Warcrack is a Digital Drug

There is only one reason that Warcraft is the most addictive game on the Internet.

Yes, it is addictive. It is giving teenagers a chance to play with other gamers around the world, and it is destroying their parent's hopes of them ever being Medical Doctors. It is so addictive, 40% of the nine million plus players are completely obsessed, clinically "hooked". The buzzword is"World of Warcrack". It is the epitome of a digital drug.

The reason it is addictive is not because of the character upgrades. If you want a new breastplate, go play Diablo or Icewind Dale. It is not because of the real player interaction. IRC has been around for a very long time, and while there are undoubtedly exceptions, I don't know anyone who is addicted to that. Chatting and playing around with friends can be done anywhere. The graphics aren't that inspiring, and the game runs on years-old technology.

No, the reason it is addictive is its culture. Culture is what every other MMORPG (so far) has lacked, and WOW has tons of it. It has more culture than the city of Lincoln, Nebraska and the entire state of Alabama combined. You want to get immersed in politics? Do you hate the oppression of the weak? Do you want to do something to help your country? Do you want to rid the world of prejudice and evil?

You can be a part of causes like these and more for only $19.95. (Or an additional twenty bucks for the expansion, and a hundred dollars a year for the subscription. This is for you AND per friend you want to play with. This is also, of course, excluding the $50 expansion coming out later this year.) Blizzard has found a legal way to tap addiction, and this venture is possibly more lucrative than the 60's cocaine.

Goodbye Clarke

Arthur C. Clarke died early yesterday in Sri Lanka. Any warm blooded American with respect to popular culture will miss him dearly.

He was a man that was certainly space headed, and had an imagination that kept on running. He gave us the Space Odyssey, a collection of work that started in the 70's, and was just barely completed in the same century, the last book being published in 1997.

He invented, or at least was the first to popularize the idea of the space elevator. He envisioned that the elevator(s) would destroy NASA's shuttle program, and would really open up space for the human race. I personally hope that I will see an operating elevator in my day, something Clarke dreamed of as well.

May he be immortalized through his written words.

A Human's Prayer

I was born in Azeroth, the land of the holy ways. I was taught the light. I was taught the truth. I was taught devotion to the king. I will defend the land of the pure. From Northshire to Goldshire, from Lakeshire to Darkshire. I will protect the weak and the helpless.

 

I will lend any aid inasmuch as I am able to the land of the Allies. I will defend the land of the dwarves, from the stronghold Ironforge to the hinterlands to the burning steppes. I will defend the land of the elves, from the tree of Teldrassil to the mountains of Winterspring.

 

I will defend the mighty city of Stormwind, and serve in the bastion Theramore. I am strong. I am mighty. I withstood the horde, the scourge, and the worst of Illidan's rage. I await the king. I will never lose faith.

My Broken Heart

Last week I lost my brother. He did not die, but he pretty much moved away for the rest of life. I feel like I've lost a chamber in my heart.

 

Next weekend, my best friend is moving away as well. It will really feel like severing my left hand. He was someone I didn't always need, but could always count on for any help. Another chamber has broken.

 

Now I know why we evolved into using the four-chambered heart. It's to keep us going until the other chambers can heal.

 

Adios, I'll love you both forever.

I'm not nice.

Some of my friends said that the word "nice" is not in my dictionary. This, of course, is absurd. Nice is an antonym. My dictionary definition would not be complete without it.

 

Seriously, how could I thoroughly describe myself without explaining what I am not?

 

Think about it.